Tuesday, February 9, 2010

F*CKING HIPPIES Q&A JAM SESSION*



Sometimes I get questions from people who are worried that what they are doing classifies them as a hippie. I thought it would be nice to share these questions with you in order to displace unsure feelings and give you some outsider insight into whether or not you should take a bath.

Q: Does it make me a hippie if i want to grow indoor hydro chiles in my closet?

A: I'd like to answer in the form of a classic "Pros Vs. Cons" list.

Pros:

Spicy food is delicious.

Other things grown hydroponically don't tend to disappoint, and chiles are legal!

Growing your own peppers could possibly eliminate jobs being "stolen" from Americans, so the Americans don't have anything to complain about.

Your closet is your closet, and you are not trying to plant chiles in vacant lots, other people's backyards, or street medians like these fucking hippies:



Those flowers are going to look great with dog/homeless piss all over them. Also, I can't eat a sunflower.


CONS:

See previous photos.

Red Hot Chili Peppers are still a band.

Your friends may be disappointed when they realize they can't smoke what you're growing in your closet and revolt with the angst of 30 juvenile delinquents.

This comes dangerously close to gardening outside, which brings you even closer to almost being a hippie.


Hmm. Seems like the Pros outweigh the Cons -- this time. Just make sure you keep it in your closet and out of the median.





*NOT THE KIND OF JAM SESSION WHERE A LOT OF DUDES PLAY SCALES FOR HOURS WITHOUT WRITING ANY ACTUAL SONGS.

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